What you DO vs what you ARE

To use Gen X as an example: You were brainwashed in old world values of the 40s & 50s! Those people of authority domesticated you into believing that who you are is what you do or how you contribute to society. The success barometer for those on the hierarchy from 1900 forward was based on questions like “What is your job?” which meant “How are you seen?”. Vocations like doctors or lawyers were revered because they were deemed to be limited to the elite. Parents and teachers told us we must DO something with our life because you’re not existent-worthy if you don’t perform a duty that is perceived as valuable by others. Gender roles were deeply rooted and are sustained in many families even today.

The hierarchy has said: Your value and purpose is based on an egoic construct in which you have achieved success. “Success” is attained with qualitative proof that shows the world how much money you have or what you have accomplished to prove your worth.

Why is this a problem for me?

Most everyone has a subconscious wound based in this paradigm. “Go make something out of yourself” is a phrase some of us have heard at some point. Perhaps it was more like, “There’s no money in the Arts, music, or dancing, etc.” or “You will humiliate the family if you fail (at university/medical school/corporate ladder)”. A more common wound is earning average-to-below-average grades and being shamed for not measuring up or told you are not valued because of your subpar performance”. It is a sneaky trauma, too, as the initial wound of unworthiness will become anchored deeply into the core of our subconscious identity early on in our young lives. Thereafter, even innocent interactions, neutral comments, and especially malevolent insults will nurture that initial seeding and it will grow rampant in the darkness - shielded by the conscious ego mind who seeks to protect us from foreseen danger or pain.

What if I told you that the cause of nearly every chronic dis-ease is a belief of unworthiness?

Make no mistake about it, though, your mere existence is your worthiness. It has been written and repeated multitude of times: We are worthy just as we are.

This is not to say we should stop doing everything and be a doormat. But it is paramount to FIRST identify and love ourselves for who and what we are. That we can do so much more when filled with, and supported with, pure unconditional love.

Every human alive desires unconditional love. Our souls know it is from where we originate.

Let’s move the hierarch from “I am what I do” to “I am loved for what I am”, then you will expand your energetic body and family in love, versus the old belief based on trauma that says “you better do something that pleases others or else you are a failure, not worthy of love, and your parents shame you for not measuring up.” Those moments are our traumas and they are outdated energies that do not need to be here anymore because they don’t represent the truth of what you truly are.

Remember, you are Light/Children of God or Source. You came here through your parents, but not to continue to perpetuate old belief structures and values that are limiting your true essence and potential in this present time.

Being that you are your parents’ kid, then you are their trauma’s kid, too! You are a result of THEIR conditioning and ego patterns they got imprinted with from their parents and authority figures (assuming they have not done inner work like this that you are now endeavoring).

For comparison, consider this: In just one generation we went from having the first hard-wired telephone in most homes to having the iPhone 18. Technological advances have expedited the information freeway exponentially from the era before the 1980s and we have access to any information we desire in the palm of our hands that, at one time, used to require travel or the compilation of books that had to be read in a library or school. Teachers and professors have been regurgitating the same curriculums for decades. But we are of very different consciousness than our parents and grandparents. The children and young adults alive today have more awareness than their grandparents, while their parents are likely running on outdated values from the prior generation at the same time. A lot of young people today are proclaiming that their parents “just don’t understand me”. Of course they don’t! They are essentially speaking two different languages. When we (parents and grandparents) can discern that there is a chasm between us and our offspring and sense that maybe, possibly, is there is something we can do to uplevel ourselves? We owe it to us and future generations to explore the possibility.

How do I know if I have a trauma wound?

First, let us clarify that it is extremely rare that someone does not have a trauma wound. If they were reared in society and conditioned by a wide array of humans, the odds are there is a buried trauma somewhere.

Second, in order to be who we truly are, what is not our truth must die. And death feels like a death… it is uncomfortable. It will involve a grieving process not unlike one has for another person who has transitioned. In order for a new iteration of ourselves to be expressed, what is not in our soul’s highest path and purpose must be relinquished.

Third, based on item 2 above, fear or anxiety will probably surface over the idea that a part of you will die. This feeling means you are already very close to a hidden wound that has been protecting its existence for a long time. Your ego-mind identity does not want to “risk” what could happen if it is revealed. Important clarification: please bear in mind that fear is not the opposite of love – it is the separation from it. Fear, anger, anxiety, gaslighting, deflection, denial, justification, excuses all fall under this category. All uphold a structure that separates us from love. True love. Self love.

Forgiveness is key. Forgive the emotion. The emotion will keep you stuck in the past. If you can’t forgive you will never have love. The love that we withhold is the pain that we experience lifetime after lifetime. When we master our emotions, we master our life. It is a process to overcome the memory of the emotion. Once you transcend this, then you belong to the future – where all possibilities exist. Otherwise, the emotion keeps you on the wheel of feel it, think it, feel it, think it.

Forget what happened. Never tell the story again. Overcome the emotion and then the story ends. Ponder how many stories you repeated for years and years that are no longer being recited? True, you likely just replaced that old story with more current self-limiting stories, but it is a good example that shows you can change the story you live. You’ll now that you have forgiven and changed your vibrational state when you can tell the story without the emotional charge. This is wisdom.

Okay, so how long is this going to take?

That’s an easy question to answer: It takes as long as it takes. If anyone tells you differently, they are not being truthful.

What is something simple that I can begin to do right now?

“Please don’t tell me to meditate,” you might say. Well, the only way to arrive at a different state of being is to change what you’ve been doing up until now. “Well, I pray sometimes” is another response I often hear at this point. However, mediation is not prayer and prayer is not meditation. Prayer is looking outside of oneself for help or being rescued. Meditation is looking within for Supreme Guidance. But, if the M-word throws you off, let’s call it something like quiet reflection or inner connection or re-centering.

Just learn to quiet the mind and settle the body. Learn how to BE with no criteria or time limitations. There are a multitude of methods and creators at your fingertips. Like an all-you-can-eat buffet of audible & visual choices, just try something and participate fully in the experience. Pay attention to feedback from your body when looking for these tools that can help you relax and be with yourself. When deciding if you “like” something remember, judgement based on the thinking mind and others’ programming is not a reliable barometer. Sensations from inside your body will elicit feelings of upliftment if the medium is in alignment with what is best for you at that time. What is ideal for one person is not necessarily ideal for everyone else. We are all unique and operating in a unique harmonic that evolves over time. Techniques and modalities range from complete silence & stillness in a float tank to a full emersion gong bath sound healing experience. Crystals and other elements of nature, in nature or on Main Street, alone or with others, with a healer practicing their modality, or by using your intuition – all are viable and encouraged. The goal is to be in a state of full awareness of our consciousness and simultaneously detached from our surroundings, people, and our bodies.

No, it is not hard to learn because there is nothing to learn. We need only remember. This involves simply stopping being who we are not and letting ourselves exist in our most natural state of being.

Consistency with pure intentions is all that is required. There will be an adjustment period... okay, maybe more than one. Your environment will begin to look different. People will leave your circle of influence and others will come into it. Things you once enjoyed will no longer bring the same satisfaction. These changes will correlate to the degree you are aligning in your optimal vibrational state. It may be subtle and nuanced if you have been living intentionally. It may be more drastic if you have created an entire life on false premises. But stay the course in dedication to your heart's truest desires. And from THIS state of Being, you will one day find yourself living a life you really, truly, honestly, whole-heartedly love with every fiber of your being. From this state of alignment and harmony in your body & spirit, the physical world will flow effortlessly and it seems to bow at your feet creating the next ideal step for your highest evolution and experience.

Know this ~ You are an emanation of Creator God/Source incarnate here and now . As long as you breathe on this planet, you are forever connected to your Source. It is when you are tuned into your core essence, you can access all of the wisdom and guidance to carry you through your entire lifetime.

You will continue to observe circumstances of concern, people may try to hurt you, and you will come face to face with disappointment or fearful moments, but these things will no longer feel debilitating or derail you from living a truly contented happy life in an environment that is conducive to an existence of true happiness. Being authentic in your truest expression is living life fully.

Do you intend to leave this lifetime with regrets?

When asked, people in their final moments of life often tell their caretakers that the only regret they had was not pursuing their dreams. Mainly, because they thought they had no choice to do so because society dictated how they were supposed to live their life.

You have a choice. Be YOU. You are here with great purpose, on purpose.